Many puzzles and myths of humanity have now been cleared up. We have deciphered the genetic code, the thing with the dinosaurs is clear and one day we will certainly be able to understand, with the help of science, how Andreas Scheuer became and remained Minister of Transport (!). But one thing remains a mystery: How can women with dogs wear white pants?
Now I’m naturally wider at the bottom than at the top, which is why white pants are generally rather unfavorable for me. The practical cone shape supports my abilities as a standing up mistress, but is not well suited for dark above and light below. I also tend to get dirty, even with the simplest activities. When I pour myself a cup of coffee, I immediately have a polka dot pattern on my T-shirt, I wear light-colored clothes at the Italian restaurant, I choose gnocchi alla panna instead of spaghetti Bolognese and rocket with a balsamic dressing in public is practically impossible for me. Now, light-colored trousers aggravate the problem of dirt many times over compared to a top. I sit down in chocolate sprinkles, step into tiny puddles that splash up to my knees and, lost in thought, place my hands on my thighs, not noticing that some of the grease from the garden gate is stuck to the right. In general – staying outdoors! How could you sit on a wall in white pants and eat an ice cream! All of this is unthinkable for me alone.
Since Panini has been with me, we’ve been dirty and shedding our hair together. Your little cookies leave grease stains on my clothes, I wipe off your tears and my jeans and rain-soaked dirt is heartily shaken out of my fur at my feet. On bad days I have to wear them on the stairs, their fur pressed against me and my haute couture. On top of that, strange dogs jump at me in the field, while in the far distance their mistresses come closer gesticulating wildly. Now, in the warm season, they like to wear white pants. Not formerly white trousers or trousers that might have been white in the past, no, trousers that are actually pure white trousers. And I can’t believe it.
How is that possible? I have already met women with dazzlingly light-colored trousers, who were accompanied by dogs the size of a garage, whose drool threads connected with every abrupt head movement like Indian suspension bridges with every surrounding object. Women with Hungarian shepherd dogs who carried large amounts of non-stationary botany and eight types of road surface in their fur. With gleaming, pure white pants. The women, not the dogs. How can that be? I myself wear blue (?) Jeans with an antique finish, greasy, shiny parts and brownish, dusty accents, regardless of when I was last washed. The optical refinement with dirt succeeds within minutes, Panini supports me as much as possible. In contrast, I meet women who wear white trousers in rubber boots on rainy days. They are mysterious beings for whom the principle of the typical fashion sins of dog owners obviously does not apply.
Here, science still has a most astonishing and really meaningful riddle to solve in the future.